Road Trip Rituals

Because Road Tripping is such a sacred activity, affecting the soul in such a profound manner, it is surrounded by a number of important rituals. Actually, some of them are directly related to not having much cash, but any Road Trip missing these elements is lacking in true Road Trip nature:

• The first ritual deals with food. Since any college student possessing true Road Trip nature is bound to be low on cash, food on a budget is very important. Any experienced road tripper can spot the frozen food section of any gas station in America within 0.5 seconds of walking in. If you can name at least 3 brands of frozen burritos off of the top of your head, then you're doing pretty good. A personal ritual for my friends and I is the eating of Shitty Burritos on Road Trips. To be more precise, the brand we prefer is the San Luis burrito (which I have spotted in many places around the nation and in Singapore), but we call them Shitty Burritos for short. They are pretty Shitty, but for $0.99, who cares? Another personal favorite is Crappuccino. Real Cappuccino is sold in upscale coffee houses, but you will only find Crappuccino at Amoco, Phillips 66, Texaco, and the like. When I'm feeling pretty high-class while on a road trip, I might stop at a Burger King, Wendy's, or Hardee's, but the staple of my diet is usually Shitty Burritos.
• Another consequence of low cash flow is difficulty finding a decent place to sleep at night. That's why I frequently opt for the cheapest - my car. Having a car that's comfortable to sleep in is very important. (See Cars.) I can just recline the front seat back, pull up a blanket, and sleep fairly well. If you're on the road, you can sleep at the rest stops in most states. When I'm in a town, I usually go for a McDonald's parking lot. It's great - most of them close early, so you won't be bothering the business, and you can just get out of the car and walk to the restaurant in the morning for breakfast. I've done this quite a number of times, and so far nobody's ever gotten pissed at me for sleeping in their parking lot. Usually I also stop in the bathroom to wash my face, brush my teeth, etc. This can also be done at gas stations.
• A personal ritual of mine is my yearly pilgrimage to the beautiful Rocky Mountain National Park in Colorado. If you live within 14 hours or so, I highly recommend it. For the past two years, I have made yearly trips there in the fall. (Check out my Personal Road Trips section.) I'm convinced that there is no land more beautiful in all of America than the Colorado Rocky Mountains.
• Another important ritual is that of music. I think it's absolutely necessary to have a CD player in the car to avoid extreme boredom during the long hours of driving. I always play the same song when I'm leaving from home, and when I return at the end of a long road trip. I play Pink Floyd - Division Bell when leaving and Don McLean - American Pie when returning. Actually, this ritual was originated by my friend Clif a number of years ago, as was the ritual of eating at Arby's right before leaving on a long road trip. These rituals are very important to me; they add continuity to all of my road trips, and breed a soothing sense of familiarity with the Road Trip atmosphere, no matter where I'm heading or where I've been.

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